The Art of Date Night

The Art of Date Night: A Study in Trickery

Date Night is a well established tradition meant to allow couples a time to just spend time together. It is also a study in human behavior that tends to bring out our true personalities. Pushovers let someone else pick the movie, bullies demand their own way, and in my case trickery reigns supreme. I’ll save Jmac’s behavior for another post but I wanted to turn the camera inwards and examine my movie picking behavior. I didn’t like what I saw necessarily but then again I really wanted to see What’s Your Number. Here is my strategy.

1. Promises, Promises: You have wanted to go see a movie and have a nice dinner for a while. He has finally promised you will go. Success! Your nagging has worked. You may have also promised some favors when you get back home. Don’t worry. These may or may not be followed through with based on your mood and how much he complains about your movie in the car.

2. Keep Them Guessing: There is no need to play your hand too early. When he asks what you are seeing just be coy or say you don’t know yet. You know. Oh boy do you know. But any hints towards where this is heading may result in him breaking his promise, fallout be darned. Wait till he is in the car and far enough from the house there is no turning back. Then you can drop the bomb.

3. Play With Technicalities:  Is he worried about run time? The movie is an hourish. That could be an hour and five minutes or an hour and fifty. Worried about the chick flick genre? This Means War is a spy movie, and Runaway Bride a small town comedy. After all a Rom Com is a romantic comedy. Just leave off the first word and make him think it’s an Adam Sandler Flick.

4. Buy The Tickets: You are at the theatre and he may or may not have caught on yet. Either way buy the tickets, it is after all your movie. He paid for you to see whatever action piece of explosion garbage he was into a few weeks ago. If he doesn’t know what you are seeing, it is too late, the tickets are purchased. If he has agreed then at least he can be soothed it is not his hard earned money propping up Katherine Heigl's career. Bonus points if you buy him food. Few theatre fights can’t be smoothed over with some nachos and Sour Patch Kids.

5. Flattery Gets You Everywhere: The movie is over and if the complaining is going to start, it is coming now. Don’t give him the chance. Complement his great behavior, how wonderful he is, how happy you are. He will look like a real monster if he pops your post movie happy bubble. He knows you are going to tell your friends if he does.  

6. Reinforce The Behavior: If he is good and doesn’t gripe it may be time for a reward. Maybe you watch the last half of the game with him or don’t complain if he drops his shoes by the door. You can figure out what is most effective, no judgement here. You just want to reinforce that letting you have your way is a good thing. Similarly if he acts like a toddler having a tantrum, treat him like one. Next time you go to the movies he will know what his behavior will earn him.

So that is my go to strategy. I used chick flicks as an example familiar to gender norms, but I have also used this strategy for indies, period dramas, and children’s films. It’s about whatever you like that the other person doesn’t. I’m sure there are some men who pull this stunt for their movies whether it be horror or their own love of movies of the romantic nature. It’s not pretty but it gets the job done. Do you have any strategies for Date Night? Do you eschew trickery for reason, or bribery? Are you just a good person who doesn’t understand this at all? Please share in the comments below. If Jmac doesn’t read them, I just may get a new weapon.

Kmacs: The Hobbit

     THE HOBBIT: An Unexpected Love Story

Kmac Review: It was over a decade ago that I was taken on a little date to see a movie. A movie I had no desire to see and couldn’t imagine liking. I left the theater with a smile on my face and a brand new movie obsession. That was my first viewing of Lord of the Rings.

My fandom is mostly tied to the movies. I never really got into the extended world, even though I married a nerd with his own Bestiary. The books I flipped through so that wikipedia I could find out what happened to my favorite characters, basically anyone other than Frodo, in the wait between movies. I love books but Tolkien was a no for me, too dry. So what I was in love with was Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings.

When the Hobbit was announced I didn’t think I would watch it. I know this is the same aversion that almost made me miss out on Lord of the Rings but it again didn’t seem like my thing. When everyone read The Hobbit in high school I opted for the Great Gatsby, I was turned off Tolkien and also kind of pretentious. Jmac had tried to get me on the 1970’s animated Hobbit but other than being able to hum the songs, which are pretty catchy, it didn’t catch my interest. Which is how this past Christmas I found myself sitting in a theater with my in-laws, thanks Uncle Pat, watching a movie I had no desire to see and couldn’t imagine liking. History was about to repeat itself.

The Hobbit is a lot of fun. That is the simplest way to sum it up. If the Lord of the Rings was epic, then The Hobbit is just a good time. I don’t enjoy it any less for being lighter. In fact my sitcom, rom com, any kind of com side may even like it better. The drama revolves around a group of dwarves who are kicked out of their homeland by a gold loving dragon. With the help of a wizard and the title hobbit Bilbo Baggins they go about their quest, getting into misadventures along the way. Oh and don’t worry this movie will feature people walking everywhere, they run instead.

There are a lot of characters  in this movie. I have watched it several times now and still can’t keep track of all the dwarf names. It really isn’t important though. The movie develops the characters necessary to move the plot along and you come to recognise on sight if not name the different dwarfs. I found myself attached to them even if I knew very little. Any peril had me holding my breath, no not the chubby one I like the chubby one, no not the old one I like the old one. I found myself really caring about these characters and their journey and it helped that the all stayed to together instead of the movie supporting so many storylines as in Lord of the Rings. I smiled when the characters were on screen and wanted them back during the scenic New Zealand scenes. Again a difference from Lord of the Rings where I wanted less Frodo and more snow capped mountains.

The score is fantastic as always. I enjoyed the way they mixed elements of the previous score in with new tracks. It conveys that this isn’t the same movie as the previous ones but that this story is still a part of the bigger picture. The song the dwarfs sing about their homeland is appropriately mournful and will get stuck in your head for days. The music also sets up the characters well and does a lot of storytelling itself. Around the elves it is eathral, around orcs foreboding, and so on.

I had the opportunity to watch this movie in theaters with the new 48 speed film developed especially for this movie. Designed to feel more lifelike it certainly did seem at times like I was watching a play. But it felt oddly distracting and I was very aware of it. Upon repeat DVD viewing I found I enjoyed watching it more as a “movie” even if it was less life like. And I have done repeat viewing. I didn’t want to purchase the movie as I trust Peter Jackson to release an extended version close to Christmas and I know I’ll want it more. But I can’t seem to stay away from this movie and so I have Redboxed it multiple times. That really sums up how I feel about this movie which was the most enjoyable I saw last year.

Overall I’m glad they are turning this into a three movie event. As someone who is not a slave to the book I do not care that they are creating new scenes. I’ll probably never even know. This is a great movie, a fun movie, and one you should be renting now instead of reading this overly long love letter to it.

I give this movie 5 out of 5 hairy hobbit feet, misty mountains, deus ex machina eagles, and tokes of the longbottom leaf... or for no nerds I give this 5 out of 5 standing ovations.

Cloud Atlas

Jmac:

This movie is a very philosophical movie that questions race relations, sexual orientation, and religion. It is also extremely long. This movie is not for the masses, nor is it for anyone set in any type of way. If your sensibilities are easily upset then do not watch this movie. If you believe in a Buddhist idea of reincarnation then this movie may be something you are interested in.

It is an extremely visual movie, with beautiful shot from all over and set in numerous different times. At the core of the movie are the themes of love, revolution, and hope. Things that if you actually get into a philosophical discussion about will generally upset most people, at least in the way they were framed in the movie.

Tom hanks probably played more characters in this movie than all his other movies combined... maybe, hes been in a TON of movies. Halle Berry also stars and does a pretty good job, but Tom Hanks would take best all around actor/actress for this movie, though I think we have found the one character which he can not adequately perform, which is that of a British gangster/thug, but don't worry he's still batting 990 in terms of his amazing acting abilities.

The movie, as most movies of this length, has a lull in the middle, where I thought “are we nearing a climax yet,” well the movie redeemed itself a bit at the end, because as Kmac pointed out, all the iterations of these two ‘souls’ lives are generally very difficult and hard, but I knew there would be a silver lining at the end. The movie is almost a poster for suicide in a hopeful yet morbid way, because if it is to be believed then you will find your significant other if not in the next life, but the life after that, and depending on all the “crimes or kindnesses” you commit, your next station in life is set. This almost makes one want to just jump to the next life to see its wonders. (Not that I'm considering suicide, but the prospect of another life, whether difficult or easy, on this Earth, or another world, fascinates me.)

The movie is also very auditory or musical in nature as one of the main themes is the Cloud Atlas Sextet, and accompanying music. If the movie had never been made the music could stand alone as its own work of art, and could still convey the same feelings as the movie.

I give the Cloud Atlas 3.4 lifetimes out of 5.

PS: If you have difficulty following normal movies that do not jump through time, then don't even attempt to watch this movie. Oh and I would not watch this one with the kiddies, this is strictly 18 and over.

Kmac Review: 

Just because a movie is intellectual doesn’t make it good. I found the last season of Arrested Development to be a puzzle and ended up heaping praise upon it. This movie was well thought out I’ll give it that. And the makeup department deserves an Oscar it didn’t win for effectively transforming the stars into different races and genders. I didn’t realize until halfway in the movie what they were doing and then it became an interesting guessing game. It was really one of the only interesting things about the movie.

The movie was supposed to be about the relationships we form with others and how these relationships carry over from lifetime to lifetime. These relationships are close but change from time to time. In one iteration you may be friends, in another lovers. The idea is interesting and it did spark a lively debate between Jmac and I on the topic. However the movie never made me care enough about the characters to feel invested in their relationships. The idea took center stage here and while thought provoking I simply was not entertained.

This movie was also crazy long. I have sat through some tush busters of movies but at three hours this was just too much. I wondered if just following one of the storylines or two would not be enough to convey the point without creating such a long film. This movie was adapted from a book and is a prime example of how some books are better left as such. I actually want to read the book now. In the book I bet the themes are richer and my own imagination can create the world just as good as any CGI. Plus I can just put it down when I need a break.

Overall I can see why this movie did not appeal to many people. Besides the dense material, the length and multiple characters make this more of a chore than fun. I would encourage those who like a good puzzle to watch. It is pretty to look at and piecing together the story a challenge. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you if you want your three hours back.

I give this movie 3 out of 5 times I’d watch this movie in my next lives.

Zero Dark Thirty

Jmac:

This movie screams USA! USA! at the top of its lungs. We were so excited to execute the terrorist mastermind that to a certain extent we didn't care how it happened, we just wanted it done, as if that would provide closure for someone, although the long war is ongoing and will be for quite some time. Bin Laden’s death was so sought for I was given my first movie review at the butcher’s counter in my local supermarket, when the guy behind the counter said “You’re totally going to love that movie.... they show the kill shot.” It is with this mindset that America entered the theaters, meaning in reality the movie could have been total and utter sh*t and we still would have sung its praises.

Don't let the last sentence dissuade you from watching the movie. It is a great film.... an extremely long film... but a great film. The film follows the female CIA officer responsible for pin-pointing Bin Laden’s location throughout the US ‘War on Terror’ from 9/11 through Operation Geronimo (the raid at abbottabad to kill Bin Laden).

The movie is sort of a history lesson in sorts because if you were not following the subject matter then a number of the terror attacks covered in the movie, where not in the zeitgeist of the average American, even though it bore upon them directly. Having studied terrorism in my master’s degree program, I was surprised to see several near east terror attacks shown, and it was saddening all over again to see Hollywood’s rendition of the attacks, and know that they were coming.

We all know how the movie ends, because it is the biggest historical event inside of at least 15 years in either direction of history... definitely for Americans but it bares on the entire world. One area in which the film had controversy, was the supposed glorification of torture, and the idea that it never leads to any intel.. I'm not quite sure I agree with this synopsis because, the name of the driver for UBL (Usama Bin Laden) was gleaned directly from torturing someone... just because KSM (Khalid Sheikh Mohammed) is used as the poster boy for not torturing someone, because he was a pansy and spilled on the plane, does not mean torture is not effective....its not super effective, because you get so many different leads that you have to follow, but to say it has never worked is an incorrect conclusion... It is just a tedious and soul destroying path to take, but can get results if that is the course of action you choose to pursue.

But I digress, I just felt it was necessary to present one of the major contradictions to the movie, by several other critiques. An issue that I had with the movie was that it portrays the raid on Bin Laden’s house to take around 30 mins, while the actual raid was over in 5 to 10 from entry to extraction with intel, all while leaving top secret stealth tech behind for the Pakistani’s to show to the Russians and Chinese... for a price of course.

Overall the movie is entirely worth watching, and while a bit long, does a very good job of telling the story of how we finally got that bastard.

I give it 4.2 sleepless nights pouring over data out of 5.

PS: I didn't feel bad about any spoilers because I had several calls to turn on the TV when the announcement came down and heard most of the details in real time. If you didn't maybe you should get some more up to date friends.

Kmac: I was hesitant to see this movie because of the controversy over the torture scenes and killing of Bin Laden. Neither of these criticisms seemed to be worth that much. The torture was neither glamorized or vilified. It was simply presented as what it was, a means to an end. Most of the movie is about the gathering of intelligence and working towards this one very specific goal. The lead up to the capture was rough if you remember dates. Each time the date would change I would flinch. Here comes the London bombings. Here comes the Mumbai attack. I imagine it is what members of the Greatest Generation feel watching World War II movies. You forget about it day to day but seeing it represented brings back the feelings. I felt the same feeling during the killing of Bin Laden I felt the night it was announced. I was both relieved and celebratory, and yet hesitant because I don’t like to celebrate death. The actual death wasn’t gratuitous. It was methodical as I imagine it was to the Seals. I recommend this movie as a student of history and an American. It will leave you thinking if nothing else.

I give it 4 out of 5 phone calls to your relatives. “There is a press conference. I heard it’s Bin Laden. Do you think it’s Bin Laden?”

Pramface

Jmac:

I'll be honest, I saw the advertisements (ad-vert- tiss-ments = British English) for it on Hulu for at least a month before I thought, “ehhhh I’ll give it an episode or two.” Two things drew me to it; 1. the buddy comedy aspect of two bros taking care of a baby together, and 2. the sheer supercalifragilistic hotness of Scarlett Alice Johnson. I went into it thinking that is was so wholly British that only my anglofile friend Rebecca could ever enjoy it, and no red-blooded gun toting American could go for it...... well I was wrong.

The show only has two short (7 to 8 episodes as is the BBC custom) seasons (so far, Thank God!), which are all available for FREE on regular unpaid Hulu, as of June 13th 2013. This show, while based on the interactions of teenagers coming into college age, has something for everyone.... well everyone that won't get bent out of shape about mild cursing, or an acceptance of alternative lifestyles... which there is very very few of. Mainly, for American audiences, its just a British perspective of things, and if you just gave a shot you would realize we really are not that different.

The show revolves around Jamie who accidentally knocks up Laura after just meeting her at a party, and how their two groups of friends don't meld... at all, and how Jamie strives to be the model father, and ummm baby-daddy (which really a lot of chavs here and in Britain could learn from) all while not really being in a real relationship with Laura.

Jamie’s entourage consists of; his parents who are hilarious and really bring perspective to his life, Mike, Jamie’s idiot and faithful friend, and Beth, who holds a secret love for Jamie. Laura’s entourage consists of; her parents, who are dealing with their own relationship issues, and her best friend Danielle, who is to leave for university soon, and leave her best friend surrounded by hormones and nappies.

I have not shared any real spoilers in this review, and I urge everyone to watch this, if you want a real heartfelt comedy, that while goofy and funny, still deals with real characters and storylines that could very well connect close to home.

I give it 4.7 posh crisps out of 5.

It is simply brilliant and “like Narnia... but sexy” (inside show joke)

PS: I can totally relate to Jamie’s dad, as he struggles to look for a job... which are hard to come by these days.

Body of Lies

Jmac:

Since I have a master’s in international affairs with a focus on the near east region, and speak a bit of Arabic... go me, this is also one of my more watched movies. I won't say one of my favorites, but it would be an interesting and action packed movie even if I was not interested in the subject matter.

The movie centers around Roger Ferris (Leonardo DiCaprio’s character... ‘LEO’ [whispered]) who is the man on the ground, originally in Iraq, and then Jordan, who is on the trail of an Al-Saleem cell (which could be equated to al qaeda, or jaish al mahdi; even though saleem in this spelling translates to safe or undamaged, which is totally different from their MO). Since he speaks Arabic fluently, and has had first hand contact with the cell, he is quickly bumped up in rank and made acting chief of the CIA office in Jordan, in which the main al-salem cell is believed to operate.

As the movie progresses Ferris forms a tentative friendship with Hani, the Jordanian GID (Jordan’s CIA/FBI) head. Through this connection they work to catch the al-salem cell and it’s leader.

The movie is filmed primarily in Morocco, because sadly it is really one of the only safe countries in the region to film such subject matter, with Dubai and and the UAE turning down the filming due to its political sensitivities.

While the film portrays the CIA as an organization that does not really look out for its own, which with the recent Benghazi mess, may make you think its is so, but as far as my personal experience with people actually in the field, I have not seen it to be so. This being said, Russell Crowe’s character of Ed Hoffman, is uncaring and really out for his own prestige.... which really can be said about most management figures no matter what field they are in. The movie also portrays the CIA as an organization that doesn't really care if innocents are harmed in an ongoing operation, with the idea that the greater good is being served. Sometimes bad things happen to good people, but again as far as my personal experience with in the area, only people that have played with fire so to speak are turned and used for the greater good... no your average joe blow.

But I digress, I just hate when films have that blatant of a one sided political message. The film has tradecraft, technologie, intrigue, and action, with explosions and frankly pretty graphic torture... but not so graphic as ‘Zero Dark Thirty.’

This is almost entirely a guy movie, while a lot of guys may not actually enjoy it because it is not a straight up action spy thriller in the way the 007 is. You should however give it a try, and you will be thoroughly entertained.

I give it 4.3 hammered pinkies out of 5.  

Oh yeah... Farris also finds love in all the mess of tracking a terrorist mastermind.

In the Land of Blood and Honey

Wowsers!!!!!!

Do not under any circumstances watch 'In the Land of Blood and Honey'. It was so poorly written and scripted that only the very last scene was a shocker.

Set in 1992 war torn Bosnia-Herzegovina, the movie attempts to tell the love story between a Bosniak Muslim woman and a Serb presumably Orthodox Christian army officer. It does a very poor job of it.

Yes Angelina Jolie, we get it, people get raped in ethnic cleansing, if you allude to it or show it 87 times it loses its meaning over time and takes away from the atrocity, as the audience becomes desensitized out of necessity. It is no wonder that it got no love at the Oscars last year, even with the utter dredge and rehashing of 'Singing in the Rain' that was 'The Artist' taking best picture.

I give it a 1.2 poorly shot angles and crappy scripts out of 5.

The next time Angelina Jolie decides to write a movie, she needs to; 1.research a RPG-7 and how it actually works, and 2. learn that when people die their eyes do not automatically close on their own.

George Clooney's congressional testimony on the atrocities in Darfur was far more convincing and moving. Enough said.

Again blowing through old Facebook reviews, but really... this movie was utter crap.

(That being said I totally agree with the the point she is trying to make, she does does a disservice to the cause by making such a sh*tty movie.)

(FYI as of June 2013 Angelina Jolie made the right decision per her boobs.... but while it is triumphed by everyone that knew about it... the average person cannot afford that... with or with out Obama care, it is TOO expensive. A new solution that is neither Obama care, nor your typical company health insurance (which most companies get around now a days anyway) are the solution...... MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT THAT...... or don't, this one didn't do a damn thing....